Existing In BFE

Like a late summer morning mist that comes with the dew,  the Little Wizard glides smoothly along the low land of the room.  It makes the sounds of one who is contented - of past deeds or a deed yet to come, who knows?  A bubbling hum.  A contented hum.  The little Wizard glances at you but also at something else, something shiny on the ground.  Too many distractions.  The focus wavers.  The Little Wizard seems to falter in its purpose - shiny or you.  You are not shiny.  You are known - you are the one who is always here.  But this shiny thing is new.  Or is it?   The Little Wizard scans and thinks.  Ah, but I've seen this before.  Recognition then instant focus to something else.  The rustling Wizard turns to you again and says something that could only be gibberish.     No, not gibberish, really.  Gibberish is the ability to phoneticize.  No, this is a trill...

Remember a couple weeks ago I told you about this Roush I spotted in the parking lot here at Waterboard?  I'd never heard of it and after some research discovered a company founded by Jack Roush in 1995 modifying Mustangs and Ford F-150's into performance machines.    Of course you remember: my readers have instant recall on all the fascinating subjects I bring up.  Anyway, I stalked the owner (actually Alfred and I were strolling the parking lot) and had a chat with him.  First off, he is a very approachable and likeable fellow, easily stalked.  He was more than happy to talk about his car and handled all of my questions superbly.  He also told me the car was under water and he and his wife just had a baby girl.  He mentioned it may have been bad timing to get the Roush.   And, ready?  He said he is insured "inside and out" and offered to let me drive the thing.  At first I was quite ready to take him up on his offe...

Specialty shops aren't new down here:  surf shops, organic groceries,  tropical plants, you name it. Somewhere in this vast maze of stop-and-go dullery you can find about anything.  And what you can't find you can get on Amazon or Ebay.  But last week I was amazed at this strange little brew of a place in not too far from me.   I'm not sure the name truly does it justice.  Let's take a look. As you pull in you are greeted by the police-style mock up outlines in the parking lot.  But you are still in "normal-ville".  But beware, you are about to leave city limits. Bottles of medicines, some were known by me, many were not.  This old used bottle of Mercurochrome brought back some memories.  This was the miracle ointment every mother used back in my time before Neosporin. Trays of dental equipment that most likely inflicted pain of some degree on its victims. Denture plasters. ...

Tomorrow is Thanksgiving.  The day means different things to people.  Certainly a day of feasting on good food is up there as is the meeting with family.  Football, maybe a beer or two and the fact we have a day off is part of the joy as well.  The entire staff here at BFE including the CEO,  General Manager, editorial staff, sales department, secretarial pool and maintenance workers wish you all a very happy day.   Remember, contrary to other lists, there are only three keys to personal happiness:  Family Friends Doing The Things We Enjoy See those turkeys above?  They don't have smiles on their beaky faces because they don't have the above components.  See the turkey farmer above?  He has a smile on his face because he does have those three facets.  That proves my thesis.  Now, go have fun. Oh, and by the way, we'll be taking the rest of the week off, returning on Monday.  That wiped the smiles ...

Firstly, I plan on being back in Northlandia on December 3rd.  Secondly, I'm not the least bit worried about the maintenance and aging fleet of Allegiant Air.  Thirdly, maybe I should  be.   Allegiant has 86 planes.  42 of them broke down at least once in-flight last year. Allegiant planes have had at least 77 forced landing due to serious mechanical failures. Allegiant suffered 39 engine failures between January 2015 and September 2016. Allegiant repaired important parts of their planes only to have them break down again 18 times last year. Allegiant's planes are, on average 22 years old but only had mechanics at 11 of the 118 airports that give it hospitality. For every 10,000 flights, an airline will have on average 3 unexpected landings.  Last year Allegiant had 12. When Tampa Bay Times reporters asked Allegiant execs about this, they agreed with all the facts.  Even the CEO said it was unacceptable.  They talked of ai...

A while back I was diagnosed with nasal polyps and got my nose reamed by Dr. Phlegm.  It was one of those in-hospital jobbies, two hours, put out by anesthesia and the whole works.  It was a first for me.     I'm still using a steroidal flush and spray and so far they haven't returned as they are wont to do on occasion.  That's the good news.    The bad news was the cost.  I had costs to the Palms of Pasadena hospital, Dr. Phlegm and the anesthesiologist.  Total cost was around $89,000, so you can kind of get a feel for my costs with insurance.  Yeah, uh huh.  So I got the hospital and doctor paid off and then I got the anesthesiologist's bill, let's call him Dr. Gasbag.  It was for $2,432.    By now I'd had about enough. The bill said something about paying $800 which was what I would normally have to pay if insurance had covered it, but since Dr. Gasbag wasn't in my network I owed th...

I was going through a baseball cap phase at the time and a lot of the pictures of me in those 2 years have me wearing one.   Country music was all the craze and being in the most important consumer demographic of 18-15 year-olds, I readily joined in.  Along with my baseball cap I also wore bib overalls and no socks to really look like the Midwest hayseed I was.  It was a crazy big country music boom that influenced me until I wised up and shed all that craziness.  Freddie Fender's Wasted Days and Wasted Nights was one of my favorites and on some nights, with a little beer, was able to do a pretty good karaoke rendition before there was such a thing. The classes were all pretty conventional and a continuation of themes I took at Iowa Wesleyan.  Ethics, philosophical movements that relate to specific periods,  and the theology of philosophy were all the types of stuff I took that first year.  In fact the first four classes were:  Hi...

From my last stay in Northlandia, these pictures of my hometown. From the East End looking uptown.  Note the shadows on the road.  It was a full moon. My grandparents house on the left.  The church down the block. The fire station.  We had community plays as kids in this place.  Now it has the occasional pancake breakfast. City Hall and Library. The old Masonic Hall building.  Now it is a private residence. Main street in front of the bank looking east.  When I was a kid the entire downtown block was filled with buildings and businesses.  Now all it has is the post office and restaurant. The weigh station at the grain elevator.  Spent many hours here as a kid, then as an employee.    One of these days I may write a post on all the things that happened here.   My house was on the left.  The painting I'm working on now features the street light on the...