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Marley And Me


I just got done watching Marley and Me and I hated this movie. I had it and saved it for a special afternoon because I thought it would be good. But I hated it. Mostly because it got it all wrong. OK, I liked the last 10 minutes, only because it finally got it right. The book and the movie played on the phrase, "...the world's worst dog." The last 10 minutes saved this from being "...the world's worst movie."

Most of the movie centered around Marley eating answering machines, linoleum, entire bags of food, and drywall. Ha ha ha. Then it centered around John and his wife trying to get pregnant, dissatisfaction with work, and the problems of child-rearing. Ha ha ha.

But mostly it was about an undisciplined dog which created havoc for them, their neighbors and from the looks of it the entire South Florida population. Of course there was the untrue, contrived and unrealistic attempt at dog obedience school with a cartoonish 1-dimensional teacher. Ha ha ha.

Owen Wilson played John Grogan. He usually plays stoners in movies. Evidently he has a market on stoner types because his voice inflections and delivery never vary from that of his stoner movies. After 15 minutes it became awfully grating. Marley was played by several different Labs and I hope they get a better agent for their next movie. For instance, there's a scene where Marley is at the vets and being told that he won't make it through the night. He then delivers his stoned monologue to the vet telling her how strong he is, and then leaves the office without saying bye to Marley or even petting him goodnight. And Marley is right there on the table!

The fact is, dogs that run roughshod over their owners aren't lovable or even likable. They are a social pestilence. Oh, watch Marley take a dump in the ocean and close the only remaining pet-friendly beach. Ha ha ha. Watch Marley jump out of a car in a busy street. Ha ha ha.
Watch the frazzled dog-sitter race out of the house without being paid when the Grogans return from a vacation. Ha ha ha.

Dogs need discipline because we have domesticated them and they have allowed it. They need structure. They don't need to break birdbaths, take off with the outside cafe table tied to it or tear, eat, chew houses to bond with us. They rely on us for boundaries and if we don't provide it, then shame on us.

Marley and Me missed the quintessential aspect of the bond between dog and man: "We give our hearts to them and they give us theirs." It's not the broken screen doors that make us love them. It's not the eaten pillows, couches and teddy bears that make us love them. That's why Marley and Me got it wrong. Its the quiet moments, the sad moments, the times when we think we haven't got a friend in the world, when a dog gently grazes an arm or leg with that tender wet nose, that makes us bond with a dog. It's the times that it comes over and spoons with you that make us bond with pets. The times when it sits with you and then nudges your arm as if say, "I'm being good for you, wouldn't you like to pet me?". Its the times in our lives when we take a second to look back that we see clearly the loyalty, love and devotion that a dog provides us unconditionally.

The movie finally got it right when in the last seconds of their lives, we truly see the darkness ahead for ourselves.

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