Tin Butt Ride

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On December 4 the Bayside Riders Club had a season final 300 mile run from Gandy Boulevard in St. Pete through Tampa, Lithia, Sebring, Fort Lonesome,  Zolfo Springs, Arcadia and back to St. Pete.  Kickstands up at 7:30 AM and all bikes to finish at 4:00 PM at the Shrimp Store for a meal, and awards.  We were to bring toys for charity and I brought 2 Etch-A-Sketches.  (I know they aren't high tech but I sure liked them when I was wee.)

Bikes lined up at Barney's of St. Pete, a bike dealership that the Bayside Club operates from.

Here's the Beast all decked out in Christmas garland around my new engine guard.

George, Dave, John and Michelle among at hers hovering around the Beast.  They can't get enough. It's like catnip.  

Gas stop at Fort Lonesome.  The first of three mandatory stops to get a receipt. 

Blurry pictures I took while driving.  Camera can't focus well when buzzing along at 75, and I was losing these guys.  They are insane.  Damn Goldwingers.

Orange groves.

All over the damn place.  They are starting to get picked, too because in one town bus loads of pickers were getting let off for the day. 

Perfect day for riding.  Darn, I'm falling back again.

These guys are traveling fast.  I'd like to slow up and see some of the scenery.  

I got my wish.  I stopped for gas and they all kept going so I had to follow the route as best I could and so i slowed down and enjoyed a leisurely trip...at least for awhile until I caught up with them again.

Hey, just like home, cows!

A lot of mining and quarry work out this way.  Two huge cranes in the distance, and even on a Sunday they are working.

I caught up with them here for a second mandatory receipt.  PS I'd still rather have my homies to ride with but until I return to God's Country, these guys'll do.

Poor Indian/Arab clerk.  I needed a receipt but the gas pump wouldn't give me one and we must have haggled for 5 minutes trying to communicate.  The people in line behind me got  a little impatient.  

200 miles and the Christmas garland is still holding up.

Route directions in case you are culled from the herd.  

Final bit of instructions, besides three receipts,  was to answer the question "What is for sale on the white sign at 5532 Hammock Road?"  Miniature horses was the correct answer.  

I didn't take any pictures at the meal, so here is my assessment of the ride.

These guys are crazy.  I had no idea it was the Tin Butt Race.  This was not a led run, so riders had the option of going in a  group, tandem, or solo.  I latched onto a group of 5 bikes because I knew we were heading through Tampa and I couldn't see myself reading my directions and handling that bit of terrain safely or comfortably.  The fellow leading us is 85 years old and has a death wish.  Perhaps he is impatient with Father Time, I don't know but the man is crazy bad.  There are rules to leading.  I repeat, there are rules to leading.  

First, go as fast (or slow) as all riders can comfortably manage.  85 is not a comfortable speed for an enjoyable day of riding.  Okay, so it wasn't 85 all the time.  Naturally we needed to slow up for gas occasionally.  My gas mileage was so bad, I had to stop at a station at one point.  Of course, everyone else kept flying by.

Secondly, if one member stops we all stop.  This insures that mechanical problems are taken care of, or any other reason a biker would pull over.  

Thirdly, communication is key, talk to each other at stop signs, along the way to see if everyone is doing OK with gas.  By pulling over I was left alone in unfamiliar territory to fend for myself. (I actually enjoyed it, I could go at my own pace and and saw a heck of a lot more scenery.)  Apparently all these guys have headset communication devices so they are chatting away at each other all the time.  Not sure I am going to go that route.  Some things need to remain pure.  

Fourthly, at stops, lights or other traffic obstructions, move as a group, not as an individual.  Bill, the dumbass leader at one stop sign turned and took off, either unaware of a van barreling down on him or didn't care.  As a result he is down the road and has to slow and pull right onto the side in order for the rest of us to catch up.  Of course the van didn't know what Dumbass was doing so we ended up with a somewhat dangerous cluster for a few minutes.  

Fifth, if you are out of your element and uncomfortable leading, then in over to insure no followers return to St. Pete via the morgue, then step back and let someone else take the lead.  Or, if you are uncomfortable being let by a dumbs, then get out of the herd and do your own run.  One of the followers stated at one of our stops that Bill had let them once over the Skyway Bridge at 85 miles per hour and she said they'd never crossed it so fast.  Well, gee, what's that tell you?  Bill needs to be euthanized, and someone else needs to assume the duties.

Rant over.   

Overall the day was great, warmish, high clouds and roads were all good.  The people in this Club and pretty nice, even Dumbass (I sat next to him at the banquet and didn't call him dumbass), and I subscribe to the notion that an iffy day riding is still better than a great day doing anything else.  300 miles or so and no back issues with the bike.  I'm sticking with the stock seat and not tempt fate by upgrading to a Mustang seat.  The bike performed flawlessly, even when asked to keep up with those stinking Goldwings going 85 miles an hour.  The awards meal was excellent and I won a tool bag for the bike and a wheel cleaner.  I gave to charity, missed a whole day of football, had to use my wits when I was separated from the pack and also got a certificate that I have a tin ass.  Great day, great ride.